6 Villainous Thoughts on WWE's Payback
Salutations, Henchmen!
To all of my American and Canadian Henchmen, I hope the long weekend has been treating you well. Seeing as this might be the last warm weekend in the (great northern) Evil Kingdom, your Overlord has spent the majority of hers harvesting and preserving her crops. This year I’ve got zucchini, green and yellow beans, onions, beets, garlic, squash, tomatoes and a shit ton of corn (yeah, I’m a cornstar* now).
*Don’t miss my latest hot corn (and hot puns) on Fansly. Warning: it’ll definitely make you corny, baby!
Needless to say, it’s a lot of work and it’s kind of time sensitive, so I will be keeping this review short and sweet! Here’s 6 Villainous Thoughts on Payback™:
The women’s steel cage match was a BANGER!
What a way to open the show. WWE has a history of great women’s steel cage matches and this one will surely be added to the list. It was as brutal and fast-paced of a match as you could ask for. Once again, I am just in awe of Trish Stratus. Since her return, she has shown not only that she can keep up with the main roster in terms of agility and athleticism, but also that she can and will sell her fucking ass off. Oh, and she’ll also go all in on her promos and run a killer social media game to hype up her storylines. You simply can’t deny her commitment to making her return both impressive and believable. It’s clear that she has put in a lot of time and effort to put out the best product possible for the fans. So, THANK YOU TRISH. Genuinely. MUCH LOVE AND RESPECT TO THE CANADIAN LEGEND!
Speaking of Canadian legends, how about those Lemieux and Crosby jerseys, eh?!
Love to see two good old Canadian boys just taking some hockey sticks to a bunch of punks…although I swear I’ve already seen this exact scenario play out in a Tim Horton’s parking lot after a Junior A playoff game?
RIP JD McDonagh. What a table bump! I get it, I’d probably risk bodily harm to be in close proximity to Rhea Ripley too, buddy.
So Jey Uso is now…solo (pun unapologetically intended). “It’s just me, Uce” was an emphatic statement from Jey as he announced his move to Raw. Turns out they can move the Bloodline saga forward without dedicating the final hour of a PLE to a Roman Reigns match that you know will inevitably be crashed by an Uso brother! How refreshing!
Alas, it would seem that in spite of the smiles and back flexes, Raquel is destined to fill the shoes of Tamina as the next “big monster who poses no actual threat”. Good luck to her.
In my Money in the Bank review I begged for Shinuke Nakamura to make a serious run as a main event contender and I actually got my wish!! Sure, it was only one match on a relatively minor PLE but beggars can’t be choosers. I still had goosebumps as he made his entrance. Oh, how I’ve missed the artistry. Here’s hoping that this appearance will remind the powers that be that there’s an appetite for the artist. Sign me up for more main event Shinsuke!!
So there you have it! Obviously, I’ve been looking forward to a PLE without an hour-long main event with the Bloodline so that other stories could have some spotlight. I’m happy to say that Payback really delivered on that, as expected! The steel cage, street fight and main event matches each had time to boil and ended up being perfectly well done as a result. Haters might say the night was too heavy on the Judgement Day but I didn’t mind that at all this time, especially considering how much energy Damien Priest and Finn Balor brought to their Street Fight. And honestly, I’m not going to pretend like it wasn’t satisfying to see their hijinks finally payoff for them. I love it when bad guys win*. Mwahaha.
*Bad Guys Win is a pretty good Matthew Good song, btw. If you’re into Canadian artists, eh.
Until next time, Henchmen! Stay evil.