Women Crush Wednesday
“The Reigning Queen of Kick-Butt”
Greetings, Henchmen!
So, did you all manage to withstand last week without your usual dose of Women Worship? I know those of you who made it to my shows from my hotel room on Chaturbate this weekend certainly did not go without* but the rest of you? Fortunately, your suffering was only temporary because your Overlord has returned! What on earth could have possibly been so important as to prevent me from delivering the Woman Worship material** that you so desperately desire, you ask? Well, sharing such highly classified, evil information could jeopardize my current plans for world domination and the rise of my evil empire so I’ll simply say that it definitely had NOTHING to do with the production of an advanced laser capable of obliterating the moon and/or any neighbouring planets in less than sixty-six seconds. Nope. Definitely not….ANYWAYS, I’ve decided to throw it back to the early aughts for this week’s Woman Crush because it was obviously a formative time in your Overlord’s childhood and the lovely leading ladies from that era of film are pretty much forever seared in my brain. Besides, who isn’t hungry for a little nostalgia for a simpler time when the year 2020 wasn’t kicking our collective asses, EH? Our Woman Crush this week holds a special place in your Overlord’s heart because she starred in many of the gaudy action flicks that I was weaned on and she absolutely kicked ass while doing so (like, she exponentially exceeds the ass-kicking factor of 2020). In fact, she’s so good at kicking-ass that she was once bestowed the enviable title of “the Reigning Queen of Kick-Butt” courtesy of VH1 (yeah, I told you this was a throwback LOL). You should all know by now how much your Overlord appreciates a feisty fighter.
Fierce, tough, intense and striking (in more ways than one)…it’s Milla Jovovich!
*Thanks for showing out, your Overlord appreciates your fealty! Also, the Kraken sends his regards for releasing him. Mwahahaha.
**When in need, Woman Worship material can always be found on my OnlyFans (onlyfans.com/vesperofevil) anytime, anywhere. Just saying. Why torture yourself and go without? ;)
That’s right, it’s THAT ass-kicker. You know, the one thatheaded most of your favourite nerdy, sci-fi and action films of all time. In case you forgot the face of female badassery,here’s a quick lineup of some of her best roles throughout the years (warning: the following photographs may induce the desire to revisit an era of film where copious amounts of sex and gore were used unabashedly to lure us nerds to cinemas by the flock.*)
*Ah, the good times…
Leeloo, The Fifth Element. Inspiration for countless cosplays that can still be spotted to this day.
Alice, the Resident Evil Franchise. Giving Lara Croft as run for her money as the hottest, most iconic female video game character of all time.
Violet, Ultraviolet. Oh, don’t tell me you didn’t secretly enjoy all the leatherclad fighting in this movie. I sure did.
Joan of Arc, The Messenger: the Story of Joan of Arc. Simply put: you can’t portray one of the most badasswomen in history without being one yourself. Duh. She even pulled off the shitty haircut.
Katinka Ingaborgovinanana, Zoolander. Hey, the woman has some comedic chops, which, in my opinion, is always an important quality in a well-rounded Woman Crush.
The Blood Queen, Hellboy. I admire any fellow woman who can embody a fearsome evil villainess (it’s certainly a feat, trust me. Mwahaha). This one is also rather recent, which proves that she’s still very much on top of her game.
So yeah, I think her body of work pretty much speaks for itself here. And, of course, her incredible eyes, killer body and overall jaw-dropping appearance. To top it all off, she apparently advocates for cannabis legalization, practices yoga, and is a practicing musician (she’s even recorded tracks for the soundtracks of her own movies, COOL). A total package indeed.
Well, I suddenly have an overwhelming urge to spend the rest of this rainy Wednesday afternoon re-watching the Fifth Element for the eleventeenth time while I edit some of the content I took during my mysterious absence (so stay tuned to my OnlyFans/Twitter/Instagram for that, eh!). So until next time, Henchmen!
Stay safe, stay evil and KEEP YOUR HANDS SANITIZED!
